Kathryn Hudson Today

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Friday 21 December 2018

Turn the Page

Mornin' y'all!

The tempest that was last night has passed, and the sun is peeking out from behind the clouds, transforming their angry visage to pure light.

The clouds turned the page!

It is the winter solstice today; shortest day of the year! A perfect day to set the new a-shining: we can start off easy!

At the turning of the year (and a full moon to boot!, as well as a night that is going to be filled with a meteor shower - shooting starts!), all augurs well for the person who is willing and able to get quiet and notice what the natural world is telling us: turn the page.

Turning the page may mean many things to many people, granted. But maybe we can agree on the following...

1. Turning the page (if we think of a book) is NEITHER GOOD NOR BAD. It is simply advancing. Advancing even (as in the excellent example of a book), we don;t know what is in front of us, necessarily. (Who knew what would fill 2018? I sure didn't!) lol Forward HO : turn the page.

2. Turning the page also means extricating ourselves form whatever DRAMA has been holding onto us, wasting out time and energy. Granted maybe WE were holding onto the drama, but the solstice - today! - is an excellent time to SEE what drama is holding us back (no matter who is holding onto whom) and LET IT GO. Forward HO to Freedom: turn the page!

3. Turning the page does not necessarily mean that we let go of people, places or things in our lives... it may just mean that we allow new iterations of those aspects of our lives: we let those we love turn the page, just as we allow ourselves to turn the page. Allowing ourselves and those we care for to reinvent themselves is like hitting a refresh button in relationship: it can only enliven, make authentic, honest, and loving, what we are currently living. Forward HO to Fresh AIR: turn the page.

4. Turning the page can allow the entirely new to enter into our lives. And knowing how way leads onto way, we may never go back to where we were. And that is ok. Because what was is gone: the people we were connected to have also evolved, and the fun of relationship is flowing with the new iterations of being that emerges again and again, fresh and new.

I'm with Bob Seeger: here I am... here I go...

TURNING THE PAGE from Emerald Isle, y'all...

Friday 14 December 2018

Love the One You're With

Good morning, whassup from da Bronx!

My North Carolina island retreat/hermitage broken by the death of that great bright light that was my Uncle Charlie, I greet you this gray Bronx morning from the seat where my Mom once sat with her coffee and cigarettes each day.

The funeral services for my uncle were of course sad but also at once wonderful because the celebration of his 93 years (a family record, apparently!) was the impetus for reconnecting with a lot of folks: (some of) my brothers and my sister, as well as my beautiful goddaughter and nephews ... and the families of cousins I had not seen in, well, decades.

That's what happens when you live in a distant land, an ocean away.

So while the event was sad, it was also happy, just as most events in life are not just one or the other, but (if we look to see it) somehow both.

While we were sad to never see Uncle Charlie here on the down-low (Earth), I think we are all pretty sure that there is a SERIOUS game of horseshoes going on, accompanied most likely by beers and highballs, and that we will all be welcome to attend (but not to play - not all of us lol)... when the time comes.

In this the aftermath, we huddle energetically around Charlie's wife of 71 years (!!), Aunt Alicia (my Dad's sister). And as we wait our turn to get into that other "Game", the wisdom of the old Crosby Stills and Nash song comes to mind, Love the One You're With...

If you're down and confused
And you don't remember who you're talking to
Concentration slip away
Because your baby is so far away
Well, there's a rose in a fisted glove
And the eagle flies with the dove
And if you can't be with the one you love, honey
Love the one you're with

I remember hearing these lyrics as a kid and NOT liking them (although how can you NOT sing along??), taking it to be an invitation to the fickle and frivolous in relationships. But today i see it differently...

Aside from perhaps the rose in the the fisted glove, maybe we can all relate to this... I know I can.

Thinking of my still-beautiful-at-92 Aunt Alicia, now faced with a void/abyss after 7 decades with her dance partner... is this song asking her to find someone else to dance with??

Or as I travel all over the place, is this song asking me to (as one of my nephews laughingly suggested) keep a man in every port? lol

NO! (I am tired just thinking about the energy that would take lol...)

Remembering that we come into this world alone and we leave it along, MAYBE the idea - valuable advice, really! - is to love the one we are with: the ONLY one we are ALWAYS with.

Yeah, yeah, maybe you think I mean God: if we are in that space, sure, why not?

But what I REALLY mean is perhaps foundational to loving a God who may seem real or not very real at all, depending on where we are in life.

NO, I am talking about loving the one we are with always, and right NOW: even as I write - and you read - this : US.

When we finally turn our sights inward, when we set our sights and our Love on ourselves, a Life like no other may spring forth, even in a space that may have seemed barren, devoid of life.

Tomorrow I will do a live video (available on replay) on my personal Facebook page (in English 2:30 eastern time) where I will talk about abundance. And even though it may seem like I am sharing the information and the exercise (we will play with energy!) with y'all, I will be working from that space of filling my own void up, as a basis to all love and all abundance...

Even if we "can't be with the one we love, honey" (someone external to ourselves, maybe who has passed on or simply moved on)... we can always fill where we are RIGHT NOW by loving the "we" who we are, right now, with all the bumps and bruises that this life has given us.

We can perhaps stop hanging our happiness on the shoulders of someone else, but rather look within for that happiness which awaits us like the last, best gift under the tree, within us?

It is time, isn't it?

As a culture, we so often honor heroes, and warriors... maybe we can honor the hero in us, the warriors who has survived thus far, the one for whom the fray is not yet done - but neither is the light, the FUN!

I know I'm in! Just for today, I'll bite, I'll check out what maybe Sills was saying when he wrote those lyrics...TODAY I am gonna...

LOVE THE ONE YOU'RE WITH from da Bronx...

Thursday 29 November 2018

Calling all ICONOCLASTS (wanna break something??)

Mornin', y'all !

The sun has been up for a while and so have I: I love the rhythm on an island I have almost all to myself (hurricane Florence left many of the cottages here uninhabitable though still standing)... humble gratitude to God, the Angels... and to this little-cottage-that-could.

As I walk the beach, and see the beehived flurry of activity as workers crawl over rooftops to tear away what is no longer viable and then to replace it with what IS, I am indeed grateful.

First, grateful for this place! Last evening during my sunset walk, I met up with 6 guys from Guatemala who are apparently working on one of the houses. As I approached them, I could see them scampering and playing around on the beach, so much so that from a distance I thought they were kids... teenagers, maybe.

Upon approach, though I saw that one - the leader, I think - was probably about my age, and the others ranging in age from their 20's on up. Yet their EYES!! Sparkling! And their grins were wide as the ocean! I intuited that for some, this was maybe their first ocean. JOY!

They positively VIBRATED Life... and though few of us would envy their life (you couldn't get me up on one of those ladders!), their joy for life, their hunger for it, their ZEST? THAT was definitely enviable...

Which broke a limiting belief that migrant workers have only a hard life. That our life is "better". I haven't seen a smile like that on ANY face in a very long time. (April of 2017 comes to mind lol.)

So I am seeing existing structures being BROKEN to allow the NEW to be born: both in terms of houses and in my own beliefs... and what if there is MORE gold on that path...?

In writing, there is an adage that is well known (though i don;t always apply it, leaving the Guatemalans in this blog lol): KILL YOUR BABIES.

Not REAL babies, mind you (hope I didn't need to say that lol!), but the ideas that keep us comfortable, and in terms of writing, ideas that take us off track. Leave out the distractions. Get to the truths.

That adage is ICONOCLASTIC: that is to say it invites us to BREAK what we hold dear in order to let NEW LIFE burgeon, flower, emerge.

That is not to say break what is NOT broken. Nor is it to say THROW AWAY everything. It simply suggests that to keep life flowing fully, trees are aided by pruning (whether by human hand or big storms), and we could maybe use some pruning too.

ICONOCLASTS ARE REBELS. The world doesn't always like rebels.

The roots of the words is to break (clast) religion symbols (icons).

It is defined more generally as "a person who attacks cherished beliefs or institutions, a destroyer of images used in religious worship."

This calls to mind burners of churches: definitely NOT a good thing! An icon is an image used as a prayer support still, the world over. Why would anyone want to smash it?

The call to iconoclast-ing is NOT about destruction, but about pruning.

Today's call to iconoclast (yes I am aware I am transforming it into a verb lol) is also not about religion at all but about spirituality: who are we and what is our relationship to God / the Universe/ Source...?

DO WE DARE BREAK OUR ICONS? To see what lies underneath?

DO WE DARE QUESTION ALL THAT WE THINK WE "KNOW"? To see if maybe there is MORE... ?

Can I let go of that which has been, but like a storm-torn roof, which no longer shelters, to allow for the emergence of the new?

Life is always about CHANGE. Passing from phase to phase, school work, retirement, aging: thew world leads us to belive that these passages make less of our lives... but we know they can be changes for MORE, non?

There is so often pain associated with changes, certainly with the grieving process that is natural when we "lose" something or someone that has been important to us. But the suffering that goes along with it is largely attached to a refusal to honor that which was and let it flow away (knowing that all is One and in the end reunions will be gladsome.)

So today I plan to BREAK my FREAKIN' ICONS, letting GO of all expectations, letting go of the past and the beliefs that past planted in me (like migrant workers are less joyful than "we" are (although it dawns on me that I am a migrant worker lol!)

Today I will approach with the simple joy of those guys on the beach last night: no icons in sight! Rather, an experience of a NEW day, which will bring the NEW rushing to my shores...

How 'bout you?


Saturday 3 November 2018

Taking Yourself Seriously

Bonjour et br-r-r-r from Paris !

It is a brisk 34 degrees here and way too early for winter... or not?

Stubborn, I decided yesterday to dress for Fall anyway: good thing I was running around outside and then spending time inside! yikes!

I understand that the weather will soften in the next days (get warmer), but the point is the same: I wasn't taking the change in weather seriously.

Of course, no one died (my favorite expression to illustrate the non-serious nature of something.)

Or did it?

It was a sunny day here yesterday, and although it is true I did not actually die, I could have LIVED more yesterday. In my running around, if i had dressed a bit more warmly, I could have enJOYed life a bit more during the day: maybe by walking from the Latin Quarter to Bastille... or waiting for my appointment outside, in the Père Lachaise Cemetary (where Doors star Jim Morrison is buried, along with so many others) instead of in the warm waiting room across the street, with a cup of tea.

The point? Nothing against tea!!

But because I did not take the cold seriously, I deprived myself of enjoying outside adventures, interesting activities and the sunlit outdoors - maybe even surprises to enrich my day!

I didn't take the cold seriously and so I lived maybe a little less.

The SAME THING happens when we don't take ourselves seriously... maybe we live a little less, then too.

Mind you, I am completely against taking ourselves - myself ! - TOO seriously: we all know what boorish behavior that can bring out, and how little FUN tags along!

But there is a fine line, a delicate balance, between taking ourselves TOO seriously... and not seriously enough.


Let's explore how sometimes maybe we humans don't take ourselves seriously ENOUGH...

1 - HEALTH. 'Nuff said. lol How do we take care of our body: the only body we have?

Do we go to the doctor and get rid of it lol, do we eat right, rest more, exercise and DANCE more? Do we SING more? Do we allow ourselves to have FUN, more time off for daydreaming, maybe, or for sex? Or for long walks, preferably in Nature, but long walks anywhere? Is there time for MUSIC? : playing it, listening and dancing, singing along to It? To music. the voice of God? (Yes. even rap lol.)

All of those activities - AND ANYTHING ELSE THAT MAKE US FEEL ALIVE! - INCREASES HEALTH ON ALL LEVELS AND ARE GREAT WAYS TO TAKE OUR BODIES SERIOUSLY. Laughter should def be on that list - so we know taking this lightly is also quite good!

2- WHAT WE DO WITH THE GIFT (our life) IMAGINE, for example, that we have (or had) a dream... maybe since we were a child. Writer (!), singer, actor, astronaut, priest, athlete, superhero... you know what I mean!

Often, life teaches us - gently or not-so-gently! - that these dreams of childhood are unrealistic, that we should put them away, like childhood toys (which i don;t think we should ever really put away if we don;t want to, but that is another blog lol.)

Those dreams do not go quietly into obscurity: they remain in the background, and from time to time send us yearnings, maybe, signs that somewhere deep inside there is still a part of us that WANTS something: something that wants to be expressed.

We can call it the inner child, but i would say it is more; I would go so far as to say that it is our very SOUL knocking on the door, the soul that chose the particular human expression that is US to be the vehicle for the realization of a particular mission: the famous "why" of why am I here?

But even as Soul knocks on the door, we ensure that we don;t answer: our (sage) head repeats ad infinitum that "All That" was just a silly dream, that life is Good Enough, that such-and-such a change would rock the boat we are on which is at least predicable and safe...

And BABY it's cold outside!

A macro version of my yesterday where I chose (free will rocks!) to sit inside safe and warm (and BORED) until my appointed time - not taking the cold seriously... sometimes we live our lives safe and secure, waiting for our "appointed time": warm yes, but maybe a little BORED... all because we maybe at one time or another, haven't taken ourselves seriously.

Maybe we ALL admire those who "do it," right? People who stand out, who rock the boat, people who dare a dream even later in life (Susan Boyle, anyone?) who SURPRISE us with a level of cajones which delight and - for a second - perhaps reawaken OUR sleeping Giants?

Or not. Sometimes such people annoy us, possibly because they nudge at us, don't allow us to let sleeping Giants, er, dogs die... er, lie.

It can be annoying and disturbing when reminders that life is meant to be LIVED come around if we have folded ourselves into whatever mold we deem "should" hold our life until it is time to Go. AIt can be seriously annoying when our choice of security - often made UNconsciously - prickles at our consciousness...

Prickly is not fun!

And yet, we can understand why the Soul does not want to go quietly, right? A Soul, or a Source/God/insert-name-here that loves us and TAKES US AS SERIOUSLY as a Master VIOLINIST would take his/her Stradivarius?

This is not a throwaway life; there is no Mulligan here. Not a dress rehearsal. This is our one-and-only gig as the human being that we are. If we feel we are missing something, we probably are. The "instrument" is programmed to keep at us until we are fulfilled, er having FUN! But sometimes , often, maybe!, we ignore - resolutely! - those prickly moments. Which is why some die with regrets...

You know if this applies to you or not, of course !

You are ALREADY taking your Self seriously and living LARGE if you feel delight in the day (most of them! lol), and open to the wonderful surprises Life brings. If this is the case, likely it is that you are at once taking yourself seriously (LISTENING TO YOUR INTUITION: WHAT YOUR HEART WANTS AND WHAT IT DOES NOT WANT - the program is hidden in heart!)

Basically you already know if you are doing it and LOVIN IT!

We know how "successful" (a new definition!) we are at this life, how aligned with Soul... by HOW MUCH FUN WE ARE HAVING. How fulfilled we feel. How much joy spills out from us into the world.

When we value our life, we have less and less time for activities that are "throwaway time": things we do because the world says we should do it.

When we do something because others say we "should", it is often done without JOY, We betray ourselves and our Soul by NOT taking ourselves or our precious Life seriously. We also give short shrift to the people around us, who deserve better. (Who wants someone to visit them out of obligation or guilt?)

Looking at it this way, in taking ourselves (our obligations, what the world expects of us) TOO seriously, there is also an element of taking our Life LESS seriously, knowing that anything we do out of obligation (like putting away our childhood dreams) is done out of FEAR, not LOVE. Which is definitely a symptom of taking this life TOO seriously, and our Soul, our Selves, not seriously enough.

So today, now that I took the time to write (yay, I love it), I am going to dress warmly to take both the rest of this day and myself more seriously. Or lightly Whatever floats yer boat!

How will you answer the door (ie, have more FUN) today?

Answering the door, with Gratitude - seriously! - from Paris...

Sunday 7 October 2018

Like Riding a Bicycle

Bonjour from Paris!

The weather turned overnight: Saturday's gorgeous sunshiny "can't-stay-inside" day transformed into Sunday morning gray, chill and damp. Paris is beautiful in either, of course, and seems to dress as it suits her.

Suits me, too!

It suits me for two reasons, really...

First, the quiet is welcome after a rigorous day yesterday spent spinning (back to the gym does a body - or this body anyway! - good)...walking all over Paris... topped off by dancing (3 hours of 5 Rhythms.) Like riding a bike uphill, yesterday was a challenge: FUN, but challenging! WHEW!

Second, the Sunday gray is welcome as it brings me into awareness of the silent and still after the boisterous and noisy (especially spin class. The techno has a beat, granted, but yowzer!) Today is about coasting downhill on my banana-seated, streamers-at-the-handlebars-decorated bike (the bike I wanted as a kid.) WHEEEEE!

That's life, isn't it?

Like a great bike ride, a series of WHEWs and WHEEEs, and as balanced as it is (or isn't), every life has a bit of both, non? A new challenge makes us grow (whether we like it or not lol)... and a period of integration (getting used to a new normal) can only happen in a coasting period.

There is a saying that goes that life is like riding a bike: we fall if we stop pedaling. NOT TRUE!

We can stop pedaling and COAST, for example... and enjoy the fruits of our labor, as coasting generally requires prerequisite effort that got us to the top of that hill, or speeding away at that rhythm.

There is also ANOTHER WAY to not pedal (and also not fall! lol): we can do the very interesting but rare work/play of finding an inner balance that allows even a bicycle (worthy vehicle!) to stand still AND upright.

That kind of inner balance comes from stillness and silence, growing out of time spent not running all around Paris (or the Bronx, or wherever on this lovely globe you may find yourself), but from getting to know - REAL WELL - your vehicle. Our bikes with their tires (or physical form) as well as the air in them: both the physical being that we inhabit during this lifetime, and the soul which animates it - more, or less, consciously.

Now THERE is a worthy pursuit for a peace-filled Sunday!

Balance! that's the ticket! Pedal hard (kickbox class woo-hoo!) or coast (a movie, maybe A STAR IS BORN - again! lol), both good for balance on the OUTside. Or maybe starting the day off with some prayer/meditation, cultivating that balance withIN!

Turns out Sunday is an excellent day to be...

Riding a bike... from Paris!

Sunday 10 June 2018

Come What May ... to Let Go

Bonjour from Boen-sur-Lignon, in the hills above the small village where I am holed up for a few days for some R and R... and admin work! lol

It is the out-breath after the in-breath, and though it took me decades, I have learned the importance of it...

It is Sunday here, in the way that Sundays are Sundays in quiet places far from big cities. No hint of human life, just a slight breeze stirring the red roses, and birds chirping in French.


This, a gift, after a very busy week, with my first pre-release book signing, and individual Angel and Reiki sessions, and a REIKI class filling the 5 days prior to my arriving here. Today, happily I will head to Sunday Lunch (I put this in capitals on purpose: this is an Event here, when families gather and eat (well): a fun, light and yet deeply grounding gathering with other folks in a "family" setting. Rarissime for me, and so I am simply delighted.

Just a short while ago, I didn't know this gift was coming my way... I thought I would be headed to Metz to present at a gathering of mediums (medium what? lol). But in the way that things happen, that event got canceled, and this one got set up and ahhhhh... I am not working today!

(Okay, okay, I will be doing a SKYPE session with someone from the US later today... but with a 6-hour time difference, that feels like years away! I am already prepared for it, and so I can let go of that event which won't happen for another 6 hours, and let come what is here in this moment, the gift of the present.)

So I focus on receiving and LET COME... what may. And in so doing, hit upon a real golden nugget: __ Letting COME is so much easier than letting GO! __

Of late, events on the outside have led me to this truth on the inside: if I focus on what is here and coming my way now, I can WAY more easily let GO of what was.

Imagine a situation that is ending, one that is difficult to release (above all if there is uncertainty about what is to come, long-term. Like if one is headed to retirement, or if a relationship or job is ending...

I remember well when the Bank reorganized (every two weeks or so.) It was pure panic in the halls! After surviving many such mini-massacres, the day came when it was my time, and initially I was in a panic: I simply didn't know how to live without that job. It felt like my life was ending. EVEN THOUGH I always knew that that job was not "my place" in the world, and I had never found it fulfilling. I never found the gumption to leave it, and so Life was pushing me out of the nest...

But SURPRISE! Life wasn't ending! In fact, it was kind of just beginning... and the space created allowed me to spread my wings! I am grateful for it today, but was not back then. Hindsight? 20/20!

Similarly, if a relationship comes to an end, we might feel the same panic: it doesn't even have to have been a particularly GOOD relationship: the habit of accompaniment (even poor accompaniment!) is comforting. and when it evaporates (or implodes), it can feel like the end of the world. Which can make us hold on even tighter, in a death grip that does no one any good.

With big changes in life: job or relationship, moving homes or releasing other addictions (smoking, drinking, eating stuff not good for us), often our letting GO can be complicated by a mist of fear around the "cliff" of ending: what will catch me when I fall? how can I let go when this feels like an anchor, a lifeline?

Today I am thinking that maybe the answer (for me, anyway - we can always only speak for ourselves) is to have FUN, and COME WHAT MAY.

Instead of focusing on what might be leaving my daily experience, maybe I can simply focus on what is entering it.

Only if I stop mulling over the past can I be free to see the signs (like so many wink-wink-nudge-nudges from the Universe or the Angels) and gifts that are trying to present themselves to me: now, in this instant! With birds singing in French (I am really cracking me up with that this morning lol)!

Instead of giving myself the hard job of giving something UP, maybe I can cut myself some slack and do the easy focus of RECEIVING what is here right now. If my mind tries to go backward (old habits), I have only to gently re-focus on what sparkle there is in this moment: birds chirping in French hahaha!) to shift my experience from the past to the gift of the present, maybe from empty to, simply, quite full.

When I focus on the magic of the moment, I more easily let go of what had felt an anchor but now only keeps me from swimming freely, in rich Life. As such, I focus on the magic of what may COME (what I say may come, that is, I allow and celebrate it), and dive in and enJOY the water. No more treading water, dutifully!!

And once I dive in, magic! The answer (what a relief!) comes through clearly to that (very reasonable) question: what or who will catch me, "after"?

Like a parent who is asking the child to jump into the pool - knowing the child is going to LOVE it! - the Universe is there, arms wide open, saying, affirming, shouting sometimes (when necessary, so I can hear)... "I GOT YOU!"

Getting "GOT" from Boen-sur-Lignon, come what may...

Sunday 27 May 2018

Psssst- Over here!

Pssst- over here!

Bonjour, love, from Paris!

Last night was a late one for me.. oh, not like in the "old days" lol; based on that standard, I would have considered it a very early one!

Non, last night was a late one for the "me" of these times: my train was delayed hours due to storms and trees falling on rails, but I finally got back to the apartment here in Paris and fell into my bed a little before 2am. (I remember a couple of times in New York City going OUT at 2am. lol)


Turns out this also feels a bit like a hangover: body slow on the up-take, stiffness in the muscles: I don't like it! Normally I jump out of bed, ready, but today a heavy foot brings me, unwieldy, though the morning tasks. But my sluggish body is also doing me a favor.

It is slowing me the f**k down!

To be clear, slow does not mean unhappy - oh no! Yesterday was a GINORMOUS day at a Book Expo where I had the great fortune to teach/hold a conference/Angel Party and sign books and meet great people all day long in an amazing medieval space! But to get there, I had to travel: rising before 5am for the train to Nantes and (thank you, Christelle!) a car ride (after a flat tire)... almost 24 hours later, I found my bed anew!

Yowzer again!

So today I will do what needs doing, but at a greatly reduced rhythm. The gym? Unlikely. The stores? Just a quick stop, across the street (I am leaving again tomorrow) ... I will go Sunday morning slow and easy...

...which brings to mind a song, just perfect: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=65lZt1EEW4E

Easy as Sunday morning!

After the tumult of the travels of late... and before the travel tomorrow and the (fun) tumult that will follow, for today, I am easy as Sunday morning. Sacred Sunday silence!

In the song, Lionel Richie sings of the easiness of moving on, forward, knowing one has done all one can... a time of re-filling for living peacefully whatever will come next, our future that whispers, "Pssst- over here!"

Psssst! Over here!

In the quiet of this morning, we can hear it; that "Psssst - over here!" that, in the tumult of everyday life, is not always easy to catch.

Psssst! Over here!

It is the call of the Heart, of the soul, or Who we Are, truly, which is waiting to be more fully expressed.

It is the call of Spirit, of the angels that surround us always but who wait for such special Sunday-morning moments (which sometimes happen on Monday afternoons lol) to call to us, to catch out attention, to reel is INward, into the silence which assures us that no words are necessary.

The easy-as-Sunday-morning moments which allow us to breathe, to recognize that no matter what came before we can RELAX!

All is well!

We are not alone, and the accompaniment that is with us in this very moment - now! - is pure Love. For us. In us. As us.

Whispering, (and when we get quiet enough, we can hear it): "Pssst... over here! Re-member!"

Love and Remembering from Paris...

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